'normal'

So you always think that when you get thru the crisis, people know your mother has passed away, it's time to move on, stop writing the blog and get "back to normal". We all know that "normal" is a relative term (especially for me). My life will never be "normal" again. It has changed and will change in ways I have yet to discover. Being so close to my mom was a blessing....and sometimes now feels like a curse. I miss her this morning. Not that I haven't missed her, but I really miss her this morning. There are so many things I need to tell her. And yes, I know she's here with me and I talk to her all the time......I just wish she would talk a little louder because I can only faintly hear her in my memory. Telling me how it sounds like 'right timing' and 'listen to your instincts, they are good' and 'one step at a time'.

I was never completely 'normal', she always encouraged me to live my own life my own way.

I wonder what 'normal' will be now.